Saturday, December 31, 2011

The WASP trainee alphabet, by Mary Hart

A is for Airplane a gadget designed

For scaring the student plumb out of her mind.

B is for Brakes on the same which is splendid,

But use them too sharp and you'll end up upended,

C is for Compass installed with much cost

In function best suited for getting you lost.

D is for Details you mustn't forget,

Like safety belt fastened or parking brake set.

E's Elevators affixed to the tail;

If not used in time nothing else will avail

F is for Flaps, which are tricky and fickle,

But without these addenda, you'd be in a pickle.

G's Gosports, which surely need no introduction;

They're for learning new cuss words' and other instruction

H is for Headwind, built in or external:

In violence unequalled, in purpose infernal

I is for Instruments--none of them care to

Tell you a thing--take their word if you dare to.

J is for Jolts which you get in the air

And the height that you had which is no longer there.

K is for Kicks which are aimed at the rudder;

The way these are given make a check pilot shudder.

L is for Looking and all of that drivel!

Rebuild your neck, pal, so's to make it full swivel!

M is for Motor; if it quits, you can bet you

De Lawd's on your side, for Green Pastures will get you,

N is for Nose which is always surprisin'

By never remaining upon the horizon

O is for Off, which is where for the switches

When, parked, or you'll hear from those strict sons of--Texas

P is for Pilot; that's you---on condition

You don't spin too low or not check your ignition.

Q is got questions -that need understanding---

Clean forgot by the time you have come in from landing

R is for Rudder, to use in each antic;

It drives airplanes sideways, the rest of us frantic.

S is for Slipstream to complicate matters

With torque, until everyone's mad as mad hatters.

T is for Throttle, controlling the go-juice;

Without this device trying to aviate's no use.

U is for Up, and the Upper the better;

For the higher you are the more spots you can set her.

V is Velocity; nothing can stop it;

Once you've too much, you must climb up to drop it.

W's Wobble-pump---use debatable

It aids most in making the starting quite hateable.

X marks the spot where the landing gear hit;

Three points was the aim but two points was what lit

Y is for yes which is all you can say

When the board says a check ride is headed your way.

Z is for zealous, our attitude truly

If held to the end we will graduate duly.

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